Savvy Selling columnist Michelle Nichols with her son, Mark, who was claimed by brain cancer July 20, 1998.

Savvy selling requires the wisdom to occasionally look beyond improving our selling skills and strategies to see the bigger picture, to put our careers in the overall perspective of our lives. After all, who wants to have on his tombstone, "John Doe, Great Salesman"? Please don't think me morbid for raising this, but I can't help thinking of what author Ed Brodow says in Beating the Success Trap: Life is like a long weekend -- it really will be over before you're ready. The trick is to enjoy your journey.

Granted, unless you were born into extraordinary wealth, you will need to work to pay your bills. Most Savvy Selling columns focus on how to sell more in less time. This column will be different -- it is written in the hope that what I have to say can expand readers' vision of what it is in life that matters most.

You see, I am the mother of a child whose life was over in just 8½ years. My son, Mark, died suddenly six years ago. The doctors thought he had the flu, and eleven days later, he died of brain cancer. I write this column in his honor, hoping to help you to bring savvy not just to selling but to every aspect of your lives.

EVERY DAY MATTERS.  I drafted this column using one of the pens we had made for Mark's Celebration of Life service. They are rainbow colored (because Mark had lots of favorite colors) and they read, "Tell a joke, share, and be a good friend." Just before he died, Mark told me that that was what his life stood for. That's pretty profound for a kid. Heck, it's profound for a person of any age.

I wrote a letter of reflection eight months after Mark died. It begins: "Having a child die is a terrible, life-changing tragedy. Only our great family memories, the kindness of friends, a firm faith, and a lot of Kleenex have carried us this far. Tragedy takes away your breath and your confidence. It also clarifies what really matters and who we really matter to."

To whom do you really matter? Yes, our customers rely on us to supply them with goods and services to keep their businesses rolling along. But frankly, if we weren't there, they could probably get their problems solved some other way.

Your family, however you define it, relies on you much more than all of your customers combined. To your children, spouse, and other loved ones, there is only one you. You cannot be replaced. To honor that uniqueness, share your time, attention, and love with them every day. If you must, schedule it on your daily To Do list.

Some people try to do more to mix their work and family life, like taking kids to work on a weekend day or bringing home work to complete after dinner. I propose the opposite: more separation of work and family, not less.

JOYS SHARED.  Focus on completing the most important, highest-value work during office hours, and then close the door on what you do to make money, devoting yourself instead to enjoying your family, your hobbies -- your life! You'll be rejuvenated and have additional energy, more creative solutions, and better stories to share with your customers.

After all, our clients also have lives away from the office. If you want to connect with them, find out something about their personal lives, and share a story from your own life that they can relate to. Sharing funny stories about your kids, travels, pets, hobbies, and life can build a stronger and faster connection than any amazing fact about your product.

If money is how we keep score in sales, time spent with our loved ones is how we keep score in life. Here are some ways to sell and live with more savvy:

• Take the weekends off. Nights too. Just remember, if you don't want your income to suffer, this requires a corresponding commitment to higher-return work during your selling hours.

• Consciously choose vendors and business partners that take the weekend off. If I know they work 24/7, I feel like I should too. That's a vicious cycle.

• Get rid of pain-in-the-neck clients. Give them to someone else in your company who can handle them better. If you must, give them to your competitor. They drain your energy, momentum and probably even profits.

• Hounded by your creditors? Live smaller. Buy less and pay off your bills. It's that simple. No one really cares all that much about your new car/house/boat anyway.

• Get a hammock and aim to wear it out. I even bought a portable hammock so I could use it inside. It's like a minivacation every time I lay in it.

• Take a real vacation. As you read this, I have just returned from driving my travel trailer around the U.S. for two weeks with our children. We planned to visit friends, explore caves, go river tubing, stay at a farm, and try new foods. Trips like these create family memories we will talk about for years to come.

• Don't wait for the "perfect time" to spend time with your loved ones. It never arrives. I hired three part-timers to fill my shoes while I was on vacation. If I can do it, you can too.

See the big picture. Don't be so busy building a business that you neglect to make a meaningful life. Sell with savvy. Live with savvy. Connect with savvy. Let the people who matter most to you -- family, friends, even customers -- know it on a regular basis. Happy savvy selling!

Michelle Nichols is a sales speaker, trainer, and consultant based in Houston, Tex. She welcomes your questions and comments. You can visit her web site at www.verysavvyselling.biz, where you can order her new CD, 72 Ways to Overcome the Price Objection. She can be contacted at Michelle.nichols@verysavvyselling.biz


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