|
One of the delights of running your own business is the preparation of payroll, which ranks right up there with dental work on the list of
things I look forward to. It's a tedious, exacting process fraught with pitfalls. Make a mistake, and you can bring on the wrath of your entire
staff and the IRS all at the same time. That's why I always outsourced the job, which involves distributing more than $10,000 a week to staff
and freelancers.
But three weeks ago, we brought part of the process in-house. Up until now, the processing company did everything, from data entry through
the issuing of checks, based on a pile of forms we filled out.
It was a cumbersome and inexact ritual that seriously depleted my supply of Tums when I tried to track down and fix errors over the phone
week after week. We wanted more control, so we requested their nifty computer package, which essentially shifts all of the input work to us
while providing direct access to our account. The payroll company — which doubles as a factoring firm for my receivables — would continue to
do my billing and collections.
So they delivered a computer to our office, two boxes of checks, an ancient OKI dot-matrix printer that looks like it belongs in a garage
sale, and a trainer who showed us how it all worked. We had a grand time for two days, taking notes, laughing it up with the trainer and looking
pretty smug for creating an office payroll system for free. There is no charge for it — heck, we're taking work off their hands — and the
company provides all the tech support we need. A no-brainer, right?
It didn't take long for things to get pretty ugly. The first thing we wanted to do was smash the Multitech Systems modem that came with the
machine. It's external, there's no volume control, and it sounds like Pantera live. We're now devising a box to enclose it since it's always on,
and information is exchanged on a daily basis. The other problem was connecting the modem to the back of our HP fax machine. It seems our fax
really doesn't like to share, so we have ordered a separate line just for the modem.
All in all, it took us about three days to do our first payroll. What seemed like a 15-minute process when the trainer was here became our
life's work as we struggled with the idiosyncrasies of a new program. We pulled it off, but ended up paying someone's commission twice — and
leaving someone out entirely.
I learned about the latter problem first-hand during Week 2, when I decided to make a giant leap and finally put myself on the payroll after
four years of going without a steady check. After all, I do own the company. I arranged to have direct deposit, since it takes about five
business days for these checks to clear (they're drawn on an out-of-state bank that serves the payroll company). Direct deposit, by the way,
takes 21 days to become effective. About the only thing that doesn't take time with banks are the charges incurred when your account has
insufficient funds in it.
Anyway, on the week my direct deposit was supposed to be in force, I checked my account and found nothing there. After a few phone calls and
a couple hours research, I discovered that I had deposited my own check back into my company's business account. Seems I provided that account
number instead of the one for my personal checking account. I was able to get the money transferred. But I can't get the direct- deposit mistake
fixed until — you guessed it — 21 days have passed. Thanks to technology, I may be the first boss who managed to stiff himself.
|
George Giokas is the president and CEO of StaffWriters Plus, a specialty agency that places writers in
temporary and permanent positions with corporate and other employers. It also provides editorial consulting work.
His database includes 2,500 writers and editors specializing in more than 60 categories. His Web site is located at www.staffwriters.com, and you can E-mail him at
george@staffwriters.com.
|
|
|
