10 Tips for Networkers

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You can't swoop in out of the blue with a major imposition on a person's time. If you're really interested in meeting Joe Lofty, invest the time to cultivate a second-degree relationship where a friend of yours introduces you to a friend of Joe's. There's a reason those trusted-colleague connections are so powerful. The time investment they require has already happened before the request for the favor is made.

If You Get What You Want, Say Thanks

When you call on your network—or just one member of it—for help, and you get it, say "thank you." Countless helpful business leaders have spent countless hours poring over the résumés of countless job-seekers who've asked for a bit of guidance and gotten it—only to disappear into the fog, never thanking the advice-giver or acknowledging his or her contribution to the cause. A heartfelt thank-you e-mail works wonders. If you skip that step, you're asking for bad career karma for years on end and burning a bridge you can ill afford to set ablaze.

Don't Dis a Favor

One of my favorite disgusting-networking stories concerns a young lady who asked me for help with her HR résumé. The résumé was a mess, and it took me two hours to rewrite it, stem to stern. I sent back the revised version, and she wrote me, saying: "I had no idea you'd take my résumé apart and rewrite it. It'll take me a long time to type this up again. In the meantime, can you please send my old résumé to all your contacts?" Sure, no problem. Is it O.K. if I include a note saying: "I rewrote this person's résumé for her since, as you can see, this version reeks, but she's too busy to type it up. In the meantime, can you please hire her?" That should get a lot of interviews.

Take No for an Answer

The networker who follows up every contact with a marketing message, and then another, and another, doesn't understand the concept of networking. If all the world's a mass of prospective customers only waiting to hear your pitch, then you should be a gazillionaire by now. So if you're not, perhaps you're unclear on the concept of networking, especially as contrasted with the concept of selling. If you send out a marketing overture and get "No thanks" as a reply, that means don't sell me next month, or the month after, or the month after that. Don't call me, I'll call you. Or I'll call my ISP and report you as a spammer.

Since We're Friends Now…

The hallmark of a disgusting networker is to seek you out for the purpose of getting a favor from you and then asking you for that favor—often your services at a reduced rate or for free—on the basis of your friendship. The circular nature of the relationship does not occur to the predatory networker, so you have to help her see it. Say: "It is odd that you're asking me for a favor on the basis of our friendship. My friends want to see me succeed in business, as I do them. They don't ask me for freebies, because they're invested in my professional success. But I can give you a free business tip. It costs money to make money. If you are serious about your business, pay for the services you need."

My Name in Vain

Perhaps the slimiest behavior of the disgusting networker is the habit of throwing your name around and passing himself off as a dear friend in situations where invoking your name would matter. You'll hear from your confused boss's boss a month later: "Gee, that Charles Jackson, quite an aggressive salesperson. You and he are very close, I take it? He really buttonholed me at the chairman's dinner last night. Sounds like you're great friends. Isn't he a bit of a schmoozer, though? Doesn't seem like your type of person." You're seething as you listen. You're horrified to be associated with Charlie Name-Dropper, but now you know. The only cure for disgusting networkers is to just say "No."

Liz Ryan writes her "Career Insight" column and answers readers' questions every week at www.businessweek.com/managing/. She is an expert on the new-millennium workplace and a former Fortune 500 HR executive.