Should We Be Friends with Our Kids on Facebook?

IMHO it's both. And it fully depends on the offline relationship. I was already on fb when my son joined. He chose to friend me and I accepted. Subsequently, some of his friends reached out to me and I declined. I know these kids well and enjoy their company but I no more want to know what they're doing in their teen time than I want them to know what I'm doing in my adult world. And, of course, there's the whole "minor" issue. So, we stay friends "offline". But it's yet another good way to "connect" with my son who knows I may periodically check in with him on fb - but of course would never [heaven forbid] embarrass him by posting to his wall! We keep it simple: blood relation? Good way to stay connected. unrelated? Not for me.

Yes, you should be friends with your children. You should also teach them what is appropriate to post in an open forum and what is not, so even if they are engaging in illicit activities, you'd never know it to look at their facebook page.

I recently joined FB and was the one who showed my son how to set up his page. I left him to it, and later asked if wanted to be my friend. He sent me and invite and his date (somewhat to my surprise) and I only go on his page once and a while). I try to give him his "privacy" here and don't friend his friends. I agree its a good way for me to connect with him a casual kind of way. One time he posted that there were no good pictures of him playing soccer, so I posted for him and he was thrilled.

A lot depends upon how old your kids are and what level of communication you maintain with them.

I know parents who are not "friends" with their kids on Facebook but who have an understanding that the parent can review the account at ANY time and even pull the plug.

There are also kids I know who are not "friends" with their parents online but ARE friends with at least one other related adult (uncle, aunt, etc) who they feel more comfortable sharing. Again the parent can still review but is trusting the child (to an extent).

At the recent MediaSummit many of the speakers commented that their teenage kids would NOT "friend" them on Facebook.

Just last weekend my teenage cousin asked if I was on FB and if I would be her "friend." That meant a lot as she was reaching out to ME.

I'll be honest: I helped my mom set up her Facebook account when she mentioned that all of her friends were registered, but I did so on the condition that she understand I would not friend her.

It sounds harsh, but I am also 23 and entitled to my own privacy. I also have a lot of my relatives as Facebook friends, so if something were horribly wrong then she would find out, but I have made it clear that I neither am involved in any wrongdoing nor do I have anything to hide. And while it may sound odd that I am friends with other relatives - some older than she is - it is also different when it is your own parent who is keeping tabs on every aspect of your life.

I explained to my mom that since I live with her, there is very little about my life that she is unaware of, so my social networking is perhaps my only real private outlet; and, like I said, it's not all that private. I have almost 1100 friends.

I do think that if I was a minor, it would make more sense for her to be my friend. Believe it or not, when that was the case just six years ago, there was no Facebook; at the time, it was in its early stages and was strictly limited to people in select U.S. colleges.

But yes, for minors I think it is a smart move, because with growing technology and more and more dangers due to the new digital world we live in, I don't think it's highly unreasonable to lightly monitor your child's online activities.

If you befriend your child and also post your date of birth, then someone who wants to steal your child's identity has access to his Mother's Date of Birth. So if you befriend your child, it creates identity theft risks if post your true birthday.

For the same reason, consider not posting you maiden name.

When my mom got FB, I was 20, old enough to make my own choices re booze and for my mother to know I was doing so, even if we never talked about it. I was in college, she could have guessed what was going on and tacitly approved it. So I never thought twice about letting her see pictures or conversations with friends. I accepted her friend request.

My sister was 15 and a pretty good kid, but whatever she was doing was done b sneaking around. She was also at an age where sneaking/hiding things from parents is a badge of coolness on its own terms. She rejected mom's friend request.

My guess is the cutoff age for parent-child friendships comes about age 19, 1 year into college. I think that is about when you lose the knee-jerk reaction to being friendly with "grownups," and also when parents come to acknowledge they no longer have complete authority over you.

YES

My daughter is to young to FB, but I was a youth pastor for awhile and used a myspace page soley dedicated to the youth group kids. It was a way they could ask questions about things in there own way and I used to blog events we all did. I found it enriching for all of us, because as a youth group it gave them a place to talk to each other and be closer friends and for me, it gave some insight as to the Teen "outside" world they were living in. But mostly other than hello, I didn't delve into their personal lives unless they asked for advice first.

It important to remember though that if you "friend" them in FB, they have access to your personal life too and maybe some adult things shouldn't be shared with kids.

Like any mother who knows her kids password isn't going to check her child's profile religiously...maybe I grew up in a strange home but my mother would be all over that opportunity.