Moms Of Gold Medalists

Posted by: Cathy Arnst on August 13, 2008

Fellow blogger Lauren Young celebrated the Olympic athletes who are also mothers in the previous post. I’m equally impressed by the moms, and dads, of the athletes. As sappy and intentionally manipulative as it is, I do find myself getting choked up whenever NBC focuses on one of the parents in the stands, living the triumphs and spills along with their child. I am in awe of the sacrifices they had to make to get their kid to this one, shining moment—or this one internationally televised failure.

Look at Debbie Phelps, mother of swimming phenom Michael Phelps. Sure, she is basking in the reflected glory of her son’s gazillion gold medals (what’s the point of putting in a number; he’ll add another one tomorrow). But think of how many hundreds of hours this divorced, working mother had to spend poolside while he practiced and raced. Plus, she had to battle educators who thought, because Michael has ADHD, that he would amount to nothing.

And there’s the expense. The cost of raising a child prodigy can be astronomical. Add up the tennis court or ice rink fees for the casual athlete, and multiply that 1000-fold. Then add in coaches, clothes, equipment. Over at the website MomsTeam, for parents of young athletes, blogger Lucy Ferris writes about the cost of raising an elite athlete:

It’s going to be expensive. In case you started reading this article hoping to hear otherwise, let me disabuse you of any such notions right now…At the so-called elite level, the level of national and international competition, the level where it becomes understandable that a young athlete would concentrate on one sport, we are a nation of elites, and the phenomenon is fueled by private coaches, private clubs, corporate sponsorship, and parental sacrifice… For the middle-class American parent with a wildly ambitious and reasonably talented child, the competition is daunting. At the age of nine or ten, a golfer or swimmer may pull away from the pack because of talent and focus. By the age of twelve or thirteen, all the golfers or swimmers at his or her level will be talented and focused, and it will be the ones with superior training and resources—including hefty financial resources—who pull away from that pack.

It is common during Olympic Games to hear about families moving to Florida, Arizona or even France so their child can get the proper training (I remember one winter Olympics the family of a Romanian ice skater sold their business and moved to Vancouver so she could get proper training. She didn’t win any medals). Professional tennis and golf players start on an intensive traveling schedule while still children. Anyone with a kid on a traveling soccer team can just imagine the resources needed to support that kind of lifestyle. And it’s not just the money—think of the parents’ time, indeed the whole family’s time and emotional resources, all devoted to seeing this one child succeed. Most of those sacrifices will be for naught, since there are very few who will rise to the level of a Michael Phelps, Roger Federer or Tiger Woods.

Even the kids who are striving for little more than a college scholarship will find small reward at the end of the training session, according to this New York Times story, Expectations Lose To Reality of Sports Scholarships. The article reveals that the average value of a college athletic scholarship is only $8,707. That won’t cover tuition at most state schools.

I’m sure it’s beyond rewarding to sit in the stands and cheer your child to yet another Olympic medal. Is it worth all the sacrifices? Probably, if you’re Debbie Phelps. But if your child didn’t make the cut for the Olympic team, it might be a harder call. I want my daughter to develop intense passions; I want to cheer her on at her dance performances, violin recitals, running events, science fairs. Do I want her to be a child prodigy? Not so sure. Anyone out there with experience raising a prodigy care to comment?

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