WORK, WORK, WORK!!

Posted by: Anne Tergesen on September 27

Sometimes, I feel like a machine: the laundry, the blog, the email, the homework, the grocery shopping, the birthday party planning, the research reports-—and that’s just what I’ve done since I arrived home at 6:30 tonight.

I think most working parents can relate. I used to look for ways to carve out a little free time (generally, by going to bed way too late). One of my sisters, the mother of two young boys, recently called to complain about the constant demands on her time. Between work-work, housework, and volunteer work in her son’s school, she’s feeling petty burnt out and resentful. My advice? Get used to it, resign yourself. Sure, as the kids get older, they’re able to entertain themselves and take care of their basic needs. But life also gets more complex—-and she’ll have to find time to shuttle them to and from activities, oversee homework, and figure out what they and their friends are up to on the computer.

I also told her that while she and I are lucky to work part-time, such a schedule can make free time an even more elusive goal. Why? Part-timers have the illusion that we have time to “do it all:” host playdates, visit our parents, and work extra hours on our days “off.” My typical routine on Wednesdays, a day at home, is a case in point: While the kids are in school, I cram in a quick run, answer email, write this blog or conduct an interview or two. I do laundry. After school, I take one child to chess, while hosting a playdate for another. I check my email. I do more laundry. I unpack groceries. I make phone calls to plan future playdates. I try to figure out what to cook (or order) for dinner. I finish my blog. I oversee homework. I try to read the newspaper. I might even outline an article or read a research report. Often, serious work gets deferred until the kids are in bed at night.

Rest? Relax? Downtime? Sister—dream on!

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