Is Anybody Out There?

As a contributer to theblogfathers.com and a first-time parent of 8-month-old twins, I can say that there aren't a lot of resources for fathers out there. In the blog community we have found each other and offer support and encouragement through our writing. I have touched on the topic of balancing work and fatherhood myself and others have too. I think some might be apprehensive about doing so on their blogs because no one wants to imply to an employer that they aren't 100% committed to their work. It's a touchy subject.

Hi James - thanks for the mention. As Matthew mentions, there are at last count a gazillion blogs by and for mothers, but very few devoted to the challenges today's dad faces. I started DadCentric for that very reason; the guys that write for the site are dedicated to providing an offbeat look at fatherhood, and people have really responded to the site. It's heartening to see that we've inspired The Blogfathers and a number of other group dadblogs.

Regarding the work/fatherhood balance: I'm a recruiter by trade, and it seems to me that successful companies are the ones that do their best to attract and retain top talent. I've written pieces on what working fathers should look for when considering employers: the single biggest factor is getting to know the company's culture. While many employers say that they're "family friendly", the best way to find out if the company walks the walk is by spending time with employees. During the interview process, ask the interviewers if you can spend a few minutes chatting with your potential co-workers. Progressive hiring managers will be glad to arrange this. Reluctance to do so may be a good reason to look elsewhere.

I've liked these two. The second one is a father who's son was born something like 5 months early at 1 1/2 pounds...
http://daddytypes.com/

http://snowdeal.org/section/ex_machina/

DadTalk does a wonderful job of putting current events in the perspective of fatherhood. Most blogfathers are mainly interested in writing about their kids, or themselves as fathers (myself included). DadTalk does that, too, but manages to be useful as well.

I don't write about work/life balance on my blog, mainly because it doesn't come up much. I work eight-hour days, and my work stays at the office. For the most part, my job isn't an important part of my life right now, apart from the income.

The topic does come up now and again on DadBloggers.

Thanks James and Jared.

FATHERHOOD AND THE 2008 UNITED STATES PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION: TRANSCENDING BOUNDARIES

By: Diane A. Sears
Managing Editor - IN SEARCH OF FATHERHOOD(R)


Maybe it’s me.

Maybe this has been going on for a very long time and I finally caught on.

But there is something going on. What am I talking about? How many of you watched the televised proceedings of the the 2008 Democratic National Convention during the week of 25 August 20082 and the 2008 Republican National Convention during the week of 1 September 2008?

Did you notice anything, shall we say, “different” or “unusual”?

Well, there was a lot of talk about Fathers and Fatherhood on both sides of the aisle. I have been watching televised proceedings of both the Democratic and Republican National Conventions for years and I cannot recall when I have heard Presidential Candidates or their wives talk about Fathers and Fatherhood. For what, to my knowledge, is the first time, Fathers and Fatherhood was discussed in speeches given by very high profile individuals at the 2008 Democratic and Republican National Conventions. And this discussion of Fathers and Fatherhood which occurred at the 2008 Democratic and Republican National Conventions not only demonstrates that Fatherhood transcends boundaries, but it also sends a clear signal that Fathers and Fatherhood have moved to the center of America's national political radar screen.

On Monday, 25 August 2008 in Denver, Colorado, Mrs. Michelle Obama, the wife of Democratic Party Presidential Nominee and United States Senator Barack Obama rendered a powerful and soulfully riveting keynote speech during which she talked about her Father who, under the most excruciatingly challenging circumstances, empowered and strengthened his family and positively shaped the minds and souls of his children.

Mrs. Obama had this to say about her Father:

" . . . My dad was our rock. Although he was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in his early thirties, he was our provider, our champion, our hero. As he got sicker, it got harder for him to walk, it took him longer to get dressed in the morning. But if he was in pain, he never let on. He never stopped smiling and laughing — even while struggling to button his shirt, even while using two canes to get himself across the room to give my Mom a kiss. He just woke up a little earlier, and worked a little harder . . .."

On Thursday, 28 August 2008 at Invesco Stadium in Denver, Colorado, Democratic Presidential Nominee and United States Senator Barack Obama in his acceptance speech entitled, “The American Promise”, talked about “a renewed sense of responsibility”.

What does this have to do with America’s promise, our children, and Fathers? An excerpt from Democratic Presidential Nominee and United States Senator Barack Obama’s speech helps us to “connect the dots”:

" . . . And Democrats, we must also admit that fulfilling America's promise will require more than just money. It will require a renewed sense of responsibility from each of us to recover what John F. Kennedy called our "intellectual and moral strength." Yes, government must lead on energy independence, but each of us must do our part to make our homes and businesses more efficient. Yes, we must provide more ladders to success for young men who fall into lives of crime and despair. But we must also admit that programs alone can't replace parents; that government can't turn off the television and make a child do her homework; that fathers must take more responsibility for providing the love and guidance their children need . . .."

And on Thursday, 4 September 2008 in St. Paul, Minnesota, Mrs. Cindy McCain, the wife of Republican Party Presidential Nominee and United States Senator John Sidney McCain III, gave an electrifying speech in which she talked about her Father and shared some of the life lessons she learned from him.

Here is what Mrs. McCain had to say about Fatherhood and her Father:

“My Father was a true ‘Western Gentleman’. He rose from hardscrabble roots to realize the American dream. With only a few borrowed dollars in his pocket, a strong back and a can-do spirit, he built a great life for his family. His handshake was his solemn oath. He looked you straight in the eye and he always believed the best of you unless you gave him good cause not to. Modest and good-natured, he had deep roots in our American soil. He taught me life is not just about you - it’s also about nurturing the next generation … preparing a better world for all our children and helping them find the right way up . . ..”

Fatherhood. It transcends the boundaries of politics, culture, religion, language, ethnicity and economics.

And now Fatherhood has moved to the center of America's national political radar screen.
* * *

I think the reason "working mom" has so many more matches than "working dad" is that pretty much all dad's "work"...meaning work for pay outside the home. So it's just assumed. However many women are full time moms so the phrase "working mom" is a useful term to differenciate the two situations. My fatherhood blog is http://www.straightdopedad.com/ and I describe myself as a self employed stay at home dad. It wouldn't cross my mind to refer to myself as a "working dad"