Creating a Great Rest of Your Life

Contribution to society, meaning, and happiness might be the three key ingredients. Start thinking about how to incorporate them now

by Marshall Goldsmith

Frances Hesselbein is the former national executive director of the Girl Scouts of the United States and is now chairman of the Leader to Leader Institute. Management guru Peter Drucker considered Hesselbein to be the greatest executive he had ever met. She's also a wonderful human being.

Alex Von Bidder is co-owner of the Four Seasons in New York—one of the most famous and successful restaurants in the world. Alex is also a master yoga teacher and one of the deepest thinkers that I've ever known.

On two different occasions (once at my home in Rancho Santa Fe and once in New York), Frances, Alex, and I had the unique opportunity to spend a day and a half with two different sets of eight extremely accomplished people. The major topic of our open dialogue was "Creating a great rest of my life."

Lonely at the Top

The participants at our sessions included leaders from the corporate, military, and human-services sectors, along with entrepreneurs and investment bankers. Some had already made the transition from their day jobs or sold their business, some were near a transition period, and others were planning to continue in their present occupation for several years. In each session, participants' chairs were placed in a circle—with no furniture in the middle—no PowerPoint presentations, no computers, and no notes. It was just human beings talking to each other. The dialogue was amazingly open, candid, and supportive.

There's a lot of truth to the saying "It's lonely at the top." If you're the chief executive officer of a publicly traded, multibillion-dollar corporation, you can't stand up and share your existential angst with the world. You have to be "on" almost all of the time. This is an important part of being a professional and being a responsible leader.

But CEOs are just as human as the rest of us. They, too, have parents with Alzheimer's, spouses who get angry, kids with problems, and customers who can be very demanding. They have the same kinds of aspirations and concerns that come with growing older.

Not Looking for Leisure

During our time together, these leaders loved the opportunity to just be human beings and talk about their lives, their hopes, and their fears.

Looking from the outside in, it might be logical to assume that these people would be looking forward to retirement and a life of leisure. Wrong! None of these great leaders had the slightest desire to "retire" in the traditional sense.

People live a lot longer than they used to. Today, if people have the ambition and energy to achieve great success in any field, it's unlikely that this ambition and energy will just stop when they reach 65. The prospect of sleeping late, living on the beach, improving their golf scores, going on cruises, and playing all day held very little allure for our participants. If they just wanted to retire, they easily could have afforded to years earlier.

More than Just Money

In our discussions about growing older, six issues came up as key in preparing for our next transition in life. Here they are (not in order of importance): wealth, health, relationships, contribution, meaning, and happiness.

While some participants had more wealth than others, none believed money was a key factor in "creating a great rest of my life." Everyone agreed that while money can be used to pay for nice homes, fast cars, and fine dining, it can't be used to purchase meaning. Studies on happiness have also shown that, beyond a middle-income level, the amount of money one has bears almost no correlation to how happy one is.

While everyone agreed that health was critically important, this group of 16 people was remarkably healthy. Health concerns were seldom discussed. In fact, several people commented on the fact that with good luck, a healthy lifestyle, and medical care, they might well live 20 or 30 years after leaving their "primary" occupation.