'Allow Normalcy to Reign'

Sometimes the best way to reduce stress and handle the challenges of B-school is to participate more fully in your own

by Nathan Kolmodin

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Nathan Kolmodin
University of Washington
MBA Class of 2009

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There are many challenges to be faced in life, and each new challenge is compared with the previous one. Each additional test prepares your mind and body for the stress of the next. For example, the pressure of studying for midterms and finalizing projects halfway through the term prepared me for the stress of facing the similar challenge of finals and end-of-term projects. Though the material was increasing in complexity and more was expected of us, the challenge was more manageable.

The critical part of dealing with the overwhelming nature of new challenges is being able to manage stress. Various extracurricular activities can help with stress, but so can working on an internship search. How could looking for an internship help reduce stress when it means you have to commit at least an hour out of your day going to a meeting, drinking coffee, and rushing back to class? If you enjoy meeting new people and you find someone who is willing to sit with you and talk about his or her career, there is no reason you cannot enjoy yourself and escape from the pressures of school. People who take the time to speak with an MBA student want to help. In addition to working on your job search, you also are enjoying yourself while learning and being reminded of why you went back to school. It's a productive escape from the academic grind.

I did not participate in more traditional extracurricular activities to relieve stress because I was entertained each evening by my newborn daughter. Being able to come home and play with her for an hour each night was a tremendous stress reliever. I have yet to experience anything else that can utterly distract me for so long. From my perspective I believe that parents, especially new parents, have an easier time diminishing stress. There are more responsibilities being a being parent in grad school, but when your child smiles at you or does something new for the first time, the pressures and daily problems melt away.

Babies and B-School

This brings up another point: You do not need to postpone having children until after business school. Women reading this might think this advice does not apply to them. Four months ago, I would have agreed, but then I met a woman who gave birth the second week of class on a Sunday and returned to class two days later. Do business schools attract people with ambition and drive who can manage stress and do homework while having a baby? Yes, they do.

I find great joy in being a parent and acting like a fool for my daughter. I have truly become her court jester, which is only fitting since she acts like a princess. Acting the fool for a few cheap but precious grins does have the side effect of teaching an important lesson: humility. I can no longer count the number of times someone has walked in on me while I was making some of the oddest noises for my daughter's entertainment. There are too many wonderful things in life to allow people to get completely wrapped up in the MBA process. If you are feeling stressed out and alienated, you are probably doing too much. It is easy to fill the entire day with activities and work, but I believe you must allow normalcy to reign from time to time, whatever normalcy might be for you. Remembering life before school and focusing on maintaining that which is special was immensely beneficial for me psychologically.

I now look at a second term with anticipation and a little trepidation. I know that I succeeded in managing my stress the previous quarter, but now I am faced with a new set of professors and classes. I already realize the preparation work that goes into getting a coveted internship position will take a lot of time, especially since I am a 26-year-old career-changer coming out of the Army. Around every new bend there is a new vista, a new challenge, and, I hope, a solution.

Kolmodin is an MBA Journal writer for BusinessWeek.com and a member of the University of Washington's MBA Class of 2009.