First Pass—We don’t view these results as dramatically good or bad. Key questions remain: the future of FB Mobile Monetization and the future of FB User Engagement. We’re hoping for a lot of disclosure on the EPS call….

—Mark Mahaney, “Alert FB: FB First Quarter First Pass—Modest Beat Q2,” July 26, 2012, 5:04 p.m.

FACEBOOK: WE’RE DISAPPOINTED ABOUT HOW THE STOCK HAS TRADED

—Meghan Genovese, Thursday, July 26, 2012, 6 p.m.

Conference calls are a great and beautiful thing. After the first, say, 50 companies, in the vicinity of the 347th call, an overworked and under-loved security analyst can find nuance.

Across time zones, They can sense C-class hot air and stock-optioned “hoping” for gentler questions. (…Next is Mark Mahaney of Citigroup (C)….)

I was not on the Zynga (ZNGA)or Facebook calls. I believe that Zynga suggested a view forward. I believe that Facebook (FB) did not.

Suggestion: Might the elite MBA programs that mint these wunderkinds actually add real-world value and prepare them for the dreaded Mahaneys and the dispossessed “DISAPPOINTED?”

This is not The Social Network. Take Conference Call 101. Discuss.