GIORGIO KULP: JEALOUS OF MOM
AGE
31
FAMILY
Wife works; one small child
JOB
Pediatrician, Children's Hospital, Washington, D.C.
HOW THINGS WORK
Through his residency, which ended this summer, Kulp worked 100 hours a week. Being a father and a resident was quite a chore. "Since I had so little free time, we overplanned our free time. We would literally spend weekends doing one thing after another because that's all the time we had. It was the only way we could maintain good friendships with people." Now, he works regular 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. days. He's home by 5:30, and spends two to three hours at night with his daughter. When she goes to sleep, he has three hours alone with his wife, Debbie, a social worker at the National Institutes of Health. "What suffers is sleep, but that's a sacrifice you have to make."
HIS TAKE
"While I was a resident, one thing that really bothered me was that I felt like my son didn't really know me. When I'd come home, and give him a hug, he'd reach for my wife. It was very, very difficult for me. I was happy he had that kind of relationship with her, but I felt to some degree selfishly jealous of her. I felt left out a little bit because I wasn't home to be there with him.
"My need for family time definitely affected by job choice. One of the most important things after the residency was finding a job that accepted my needs for family time. I didn't want to work in such a small group that on-call time would be excessive and flexibility would be rationed. This job leaves me a good deal of flexibility. I was very fortunate. [Still,] the hours are dictated by the needs of the practice. Flexibility isn't such a simple subject -- I need to carry my load in the office. [Ideally,] I would be working four days a week.
I would like the opportunity to have an extra day not only for family but for career issues too -- I'd like to do some teaching. My wife is cutting back a bit on her hours at work, and that puts some more pressure on me. I have to play the role of major breadwinner even more. It's not something I mind. But it makes me a little jealous that she could have her hands on her career and on the pulse of the family. There's not as much room for that for men."
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